If You're Not The One
by Hikari Kuu
Summary: Lei Fang feels as if life just chewed her up and spat her back out. Feeling lost and hopeless without Jann Lee to love her she decides she has no purpose to live. Don't take anybody for granted because you never know when you might lose them. One Shot. R


Disclaimer: I don't own DOA or the song used at the end of this story that is by Daniel Bedingfield

If You're Not The One

Lei fang watched the rain slide sleekly down the fogged oblique glass window that stood before her. Her shimmering gray eyes followed the cars as they sped back and forth on the drenched scintillating road that reflected every movement that touched its concrete floor. Her stomach was tied in knots, making her want to run to the bathroom and start throwing up her worries down the toilet she hadn't bothered cleaning lately. Her eyes were blood shot dry- after all she had been sitting there all day...waiting. She was waiting patiently for the pain to leave.

She passed a hand through her sweat tangled silk black locks, eyeing a rain drop that started making its way down the window. It was the window she would look out of whenever she felt life was falling on top of her all at once. It was the window she had spent so much money on to decorate it with the best fabrics in town. But none of that mattered anymore.

The sky was drowned with adjoined gray clouds that she always wished away once she caught sight of them. That also wouldn't matter anymore once she was done with the business that should've been settled long ago. It would just become a memory. A memory that would most likely be forgotten. In a matter of moments she'd be free finally at peace.

Jann Lee would be pleased that he wouldn't have to be bothered by such a nuisance of a woman anymore. He would be contented that his baby would die along with her. He didn't love her so it's not like he would care. Lei fang began to cough- suddenly it was hard for her to breathe in air that seemed to be there just moments ago. Short brief gasps were coughed out as she grasped her chest... the bottle of Advil and the glass of bacardi she had gulped down were starting to get to her. Her suffering had to end and this was the only way she could finish it..

Lei fang stood up, half-conscience, trying to keep herself straight as she walked through the spinning room that seemed to have gone up ten degrees in the last few seconds. She was tired of being Ms. Little-Perfect... she was sick of following Jann Lee with her tail between her legs like a dog who expected to be spanked with a newspaper for shitting on the carpet. She was disgusted with herself in everyway. He was all that she had, he was what was making her happy and running all these years. He was the man that always pushed her away as if she were nothing and treated her like some juvenile adolescent.

He was the one she loved singing to, dancing with, and most importantly- being caressed by his secure soothing arms. She could remember his face when he read the pregnancy test- his eyes wide open and a grimace across his face. Ever since that day he had walked out and away from her life. A sudden pain jolted in between her legs and she let out a little whimper. Her college professor teacher had been raping her more than often lately- time and time again leaving her lying out on the hallway of the campus with scratches on her neck and blood dripping down from between her legs that had been more than just penetrated and controlled .

Her head was throbbing with such pain that it reminded her of her dad punching her head because she had gotten a B on a test. Stumbling over her own foot, her body collapsed on the infested green carpet that smelled like urine. Lei fang looked over at the kitchen. The knife she wanted was sitting right beside the pile of dirty cups and plates that were stacked up in the sink she hadn't paid any attention to for weeks.

She had to get up and shake off the heavy drowsiness that was showered throughout her body. Trembling from her overdose on Advil, she sluggishly pushed herself up with her reeking hair hanging loosely at her sides.

Walking past piles of ripped sheets and curtains, shattered glass, and small blood puddles she gripped the knife off of the counter. "This is what Jann Lee wants. This is what professor said I should do. I'm nothing anymore. I'm no genius. I'm no tai chi master. I'm no rich girl. I....AM....NOTHING!!!" Lei fang screamed, sliding up the sleeve of her new blouse and slashing her wrist with the knife that trembled in an uncontrollable manner in her hand.

Blood shot on the floor and splattered on her shirt. A tear ran down Lei fangs cheek, leaving a feint fluorescent trail and falling off her chin. She couldn't breathe... her time was coming. "I've no meaning. My life **has** no meaning. My baby would've suffered anyways. What!?! Stop that! Leave me alone! Please stop it! Get the fuck out of here! You stupid bitch leave me the hell alone!" Lei fang cried out as she grabbed a stack of cups and plates from the sink and lunged them towards the smoke stained wall. She could hear, see, and feel someone but all that was there was a figment of her imagination.

She dropped down to her knees and began crying unmanageably- forgetting that she had just thrown a burning candle at the wall earlier that day. That night along with her, the baby, and the house- everything burned to ashes.

Jann Lee lunged himself on his couch and slouched back, turned on the television, and started opening the mail that had been piling in his mailbox. He had finally had time to check it today- working over time for the new job he had was becoming a nightmare. More of it than he imagined it would be. The pay wasn't good but he was willing to do anything to pay the bills and send some money to Lei-fang for the baby that they were expecting.

He ran his hands through his spiked brown hair and began to open a yellow envelope that seemed to be sprayed with a strong perfume. Before he took out the note that was inside he glanced at the television. The Yankee's were winning, he smiled in relief. Taking out the letter and reading it, his mouth seemed to have disconnected from his jaw as it dropped. He put the letter aside feeling kind of shaken and then he picked up the newspaper. The front page read: House Burned To Ashes With Girl Inside. His eyes shockingly swelled with tears and he wavered slightly, biting his lower lip. Why had he taken her for granted?

He picked up the letter again and let the perfume fill his nose with the sweet essence that smelled exactly like Lei fang's favorite perfume.

Dear Jann Lee,

If I'm not made for you then why does my heart tell me that I am? Is there any way that I can stay in you're arms? If I don't need you then why am I crying on my bed? If I don't need you then why does your name resounds in my head? If you're not for me then why does this distance maim my life? If you're not for me then why do I dream of you as my husband? I don't know why you're so far away. But I know that this much is true. We'll make it through and I hope you are the one I share my life with. I wish that you could be the one I die with. And I pray in you am the one I build my home with. I hope I love you all my life.

End This story means a lot to me in a lot of ways. First of all I think it has a strong message that anyone can comprehend and even relate to. I think its very important not to take people for granted because you never know when you might lose them. And you might never have the chance to tell that person how much you love them again. Also, another message that is weaved into this story is that they're are people so much worse than we are. We complain about our computers freezing up when people are in bed dying from hunger or something like that.


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